SEPTEMBER 14 - 18

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Progress Reports: were sent home on Friday, September 11. It is very important that you read and discuss this report with your child. Reports need to come back to school with your signature. If you need to set up appointments, please do not hesitate to contact the school for assistance.

This article is very interesting and it is related to grades.

Why You Shouldn’t Pay Children for Grades

By AMY MCCREADY, The New York Times

“My kid’s job is school. So why shouldn’t I pay her for good grades? After all, I get paid for the work I do.”

As someone who works with parents, I hear that a lot, and as a parent of two teenage boys myself, I completely understand. We have high hopes for our kids when it comes to their future—meaning, at a minimum, that we’d rather they not live in our basement into their thirties. We desperately need a way to get our children’s minds off the latest video game and onto their algebra test, so we promise a cash reward or a new toy for performance.

But no matter how much we want it to, money can’t buy smarts, motivation or school success.

In fact, it can’t even buy good grades for very long. Though you may see initial improvement, numerous studies have shown that over time, rewards dampen excitement about a task — exactly the opposite of what we’re going for.

Rewards also foster a “what’s in it for me?” attitude. If the reward is money for good grades, it sends the message that the reason to work hard in school is to enrich your wallet rather than your mind. It also puts the burden on parents to continue dangling carrots in front of their children as motivation. And if the child doesn’t enjoy history, is a $20 payout required rather than the standard $5 for an A?

Children who are rewarded for good grades start to feel entitled to a payout, which robs them of the ability to cultivate a love of learning and a sense of responsibility for their own education. That A grade we paid dearly for actually does nothing to guarantee the future success we’re banking on. Instead, parents need to help their children develop the school skills they need to succeed now and down the road. No-bribe strategies like these work:

Put studies before screen time. While a few children may beg to be quizzed on their spelling, most need a push to pick up good study habits. Stick to a consistent, no-excuses, “When-Then” schoolwork routine. Tell your children, for example, “When your homework is done, including reviewing for upcoming tests, then you may enjoy your media time for the day.”

Refuse to rescue If you have a frequent forgetter, it may be time to institute a No-Rescue Policy when it comes to homework. Tell children in upper elementary school or above: “You’re really growing up, and you’re old enough now to manage your own homework. I’ll no longer be reminding you about homework or delivering it to you at school if you forget it. Now, what are your ideas for keeping track of your assignments?” Set them up for success and then put the ball squarely in their court, even allowing them to fail. They will reap greater rewards from learning important life lessons about responsibility than from any cash payment.

Emphasize the action, not the A When commending your children, use encouraging words that focus on the effort or behavior that led to a good result, rather than the result itself. So if you see your 14-year-old studying her biology notes every night before a test, say: “You’ve really worked hard to prepare for your test. You must be proud of your effort.” If she gets a good grade, use the opportunity to highlight her hard work rather than the outcome. And if she doesn’t? Encourage her to keep trying, and remind her that persistence will pay off in the long run.

Be helpful, but not too helpful If “Mom, I need help!” is code for “Mom, please do it for me!” it may be time to establish a Help Policy. Tell your children, “I’m happy to help with homework between 6:30 and 8, and only after you’ve completed everything you know how to do and you can explain your thought process for the questions you can’t figure out.”

Make it their job — not yours Not every child is going to be the head of their class, and chances are they’re not going to follow in our footsteps or pursue all the dreams we have for them. While it may seem like parental misconduct to let our children take age-appropriate responsibility for their own education (and fail sometimes, too) letting children manage their own homework, studies and grades, for better or worse, is the best way to prepare them to navigate life’s ups and downs and become who they want to be.

Our children’s success, on their terms, is not something we can put a price on. Paying for grades without helping children cultivate life skills like dedication and accountability will only prepare them to rely on payouts and other external motivating factors down the road. Instead, when we inspire a love of learning, cultivate good habits and allow them to plot their own course, they will truly flourish.

Amy McCready is the Founder of PositiveParentingSolutions.com and the author of “The “Me, Me, Me” Epidemic – A Step-by-Step Guide to Raising Capable, Grateful Kids in an Over-Entitled World.”

Taken from:

http://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/parenting/2015/09/13/why-you-shouldnt-pay-children-for-grades/?module=BlogPost-Title&version=Blog+Main&contentCollection=Back-to-School&action=Click&pgtype=Blogs&region=Body&xid=soc_socialflow_facebook_realsimple&_r=0&referrer=